You are hung up on believing that patriarchy is about men over women. It’s not, or not exclusively. Patriarchy is a social system that is a dominance hierarchy where those who are weaker are dominated by those who are stronger. Sometimes this is men dominating and abusing women, but it’s also just as often men abusing other men, or even stronger and more privileged women abusing weaker men. Ever had a shitty boss?

It’s a pyramid-shaped hierarchy, and the majority of those at the apex are elite White men, but that doesn’t mean that other men, or even other White men, aren’t being dominated by someone else. The hierarchy is performative, meaning that you have to always be proving yourself and justifying your ranking — jousting against potential competitors for your position. That’s why there is so much constant competition between men in particular (although women do this also) and so little true connection and cooperation. Most adult men don’t have any close friendships, because they have been trained to view all other men as competition for rank in the hierarchy and to never show any vulnerability. Can’t have emotional intimacy if you can’t be vulnerable. Hence, an epidemic of male depression and suicide because as a social species we are hardwired for connection. Being socialized away from that natural state is incredibly harmful to men.

Power has little to do with physical strength in this day and age. You are purposely refusing to understand what I’m talking about (as usual) because you are contrarian in the extreme when it comes to this topic. You are rather like the men I described in my blackpilled piece who want to blame everything on women rather than the social system that is hurting them too. Patriarchy has failed you as well, just like it has nearly every other man because only a very few sit at the top of the pyramid. The fact that you and so many other men refuse to see that is one of its most diabolical perversities.

And the fact that men normally are at the head of families and countries in a patriarchy doesn’t mean they got there because THEY were male.” Oh really? Please explain then how that happens organically. Hate to break it to you, but you are not an individual in the way that you’d like to think you are; you are a product of your society — a patriarchal dominance hierarchy. Unless you have made a conscious decision to take a look at your life and choose how to go forward in it (as you have in a few aspects already) then you are simply being run by your social programming from behind the scenes like a puppet.

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Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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