“Urgh, why on earth would someone think a fun event was a good place to pick on someone!?” I think the answer to that is the performative hierarchy of the “man box.” It’s the same reason that street harassment escalates if men are in a group.
But yes, I have a really good life with a really good man, meaningful work and great friends. I know who I am, and what I’m about because I’ve worked hard to discover that. I am not a mindless sheep looking to make myself feel better by making someone else feel worse.