“This was my first step in learning how to forge a truly great, unshakable relationship, one that didn’t need a rickety fence around it to ward off marauders.” We opened up our long-term relationship several years ago and this was the hardest part for my husband, but he finally got to that place. Now we have a stronger, better-than-ever relationship because it’s not based on insecurity or possessiveness. We still have boundaries we’ve agreed to, but they are few and simple. Long gone are the days that you described when every little nuance of a “rule” had to be adjudicated. My position was, “Do you trust that I love you, am committed to you, and that I would not do something to intentionally hurt you or our relationship?” If not, then all the rules in the world are not ultimately going to matter.

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Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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