This is the way that humans lived for 97% of human history. No monkeys needed! It’s also very healthy and fulfilling to not need to control your partner but to live honestly in true partnership.

“For marriage as we know it to survive in the future, we will all have to catch up. Things are shifting dramatically in our society. We are learning a new form of relationship — not based on sex, or swinging or adventure — but based on integrity, a new concept for many of us. Being out in the open about our real feelings many be a new and creative style of relating. This type of relating is not founded in following our lust or our impulses but is the basis of forming a new style of relationship that is honest — honest with ourselves about what we really want and desire and honest with our partners about what we need. There is an inherent maturity in standing up for what we believe is our truth — even if it is the need to love more than one person at a time.”

The great anthropologist and comparativist Sarah Hrdy tells us that, across species, including among humans, the best mother for many eons was the one who was, under particular and far-from-rare ecological circumstances, promiscuous. By being so, she could hedge against male infertility, up her odds of a healthy pregnancy and robust offspring, and create a wider network of support by lining up two or three males who figured the offspring might be theirs.”

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Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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