“there is no better reassurance than listening to someone and engaging with them on a human level, rather than trying to hurry them into sex that they feel ambiguous or fearful about having.” No truer words!
I have actually heard a fairly well-known pick-up artist say that the best way to get a woman to go home with you is to ask her questions that you actually want to know the answer to and to make a real human connection. If the connection just isn’t there, go on and find someone else that you do have it with.
James and I have been together for over 30 years, 26 of those married. He still asks me for permission to touch me in certain ways and at certain times. We read each other pretty well at this juncture, but there are times where affirmative consent is still needed and it’s much appreciated. It’s just one of the ways he shows me that he doesn’t take me for granted.