Thanks for sharing that J Apple Muncy. The notion that sex is something that men try to get from women or do to them and not a mutually enjoyable activity is one of the worst elements of the patriarchal paradigm. For most of our human history sex was considered not only natural, but a powerful way to connect to our larger selves. Love’s tears are a beautiful testiment to that.
As far as we’ve come in the last 50 years, women’s sexuality is still feared and controlled. Detrimental programming for both men and women keeps us from enjoying our sexual lives as fully as we could.
Even as emotionally healthy and sexually vibrant a relationship as James and I had, it wasn’t until we started inviting others into our bed that we were able to fully break out of that patriarchal sexual paradigm — it was so deeply ingrained and largely unconscious.