Thank you for mansplaining my own life and my own writing to me. There’s nothing I like better than to be told what has happened to me, what has been said to me, what I think, etc., by some random guy who wasn’t there when it happened and doesn’t know the first thing about me. Before you label that as also misandric, take a moment to understand that what you did is literally the dictionary definition of mansplaining.

I wrote this OP because I got tired of responding to these same stupid assertions on an individual basis, time and time again. Now when I hear them, I can just link this story. The very first sentence of this OP is this: I keep seeing the same old lame tropes coming up again over and over in discussions.

A bit further down I say it again: I get tired of repeatedly addressing these tropes which are meant to deflect that fact (that both men and women are harmed by patriarchy, albeit in different ways). Here are a few of the more egregious and often mentioned ones, dismantled. That way, I can simply link this post in the future and save myself some time:

There were at least 5 comments from men in support of these stupid assertions, so once again Don Quixote, you were off tilting at windmills and reveling in your own identity as the opinion police rather than paying attention to what was actually taking place.

This is a direct response to specific things that some men have said to me — repeatedly. One of the comments, from a trans-woman, affirmed that these are comments often made by certain men. What the men you know think or say is irrelevant because you are not the center of the known universe. The things that are said to me or happen to me may very well be different because I’m not you — duh!

A concise and logical refutation of the typical responses from butt-hurt men.

The subtitle and the conclusion both speak to how current society is harmful to both men and women and suggests that we work together to create a better one for everyone.

Here’s another quote to support that: In order to create better lives for all citizens, we need to have a society that values both traditionally masculine and traditionally feminine characteristics equally and allows people to be whatever blend of those they actually are, without censure or shame.

If you find that misandric, I suggest you read the final, final conclusion again:

Before tossing out “tribal markers” that you’ve heard someone else say, consider whether or not they have any substance or truth beyond an initial impression of validity. Consider whether or not you are engaging in an actual conversation or just trying to defend your ideology. Are you trying to figure out how to make this world a better place for all, or not?

PS — I sometimes write stories about the most inane or off-base comments that I’ve ever gotten. This one is right up there near the top, so heads up that it may appear in a future story.

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Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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