Sadly, every bit of what you have written is true. I’ve heard a lot of stories similar to yours about guys starting in with something like choking and not even bothering to ask if the woman wants/likes that because they just presumed she did since women in porn seem to like it. Erotic choking is possible, and some women do enjoy it, but it’s not something to be done without asking by someone who doesn’t know what they are doing, and for many young people porn is the only sex education that they get.
Sexy porn where the woman was actually enjoying herself would be great. Too bad it’s so rare.