Of course men can be victims. I’ve never once denied that. Why do you insist on putting words into my mouth? If you don’t believe the statistics from the Bureau of Justice Statistics, who will you believe?

This is what you’ve said in response to my comment: “Every woman I know (and most likely nearly every woman you know) has some kind of story — whether it’s full on rape or groping or harassment and most women have multiple experiences. This has been the history of what it means to be female in this world, and it’s time for that to end! This is not a political or idealogical stance — it’s a human decency stance! And we need good men to help bring about greater progress. This is a sociology problem, and not a government problem.

You are using inflated and distorted and even old data to push a political agenda, not a fact based one. Yes you are exaggerating the numbers using polls, not facts. Yes you are preaching victimization mindsets where you see all women as victims and all men as abusers.”

I’m vulnerable and open and you use that opportunity to attack me and denigrate other victims like me and to make erroneous assertions that we hate men because we are tired of being hurt. That makes me cry. I’m not saying that to be manipulative or whatever. I have tears in my eyes and I’ve been physically sick over these past two weeks, as have been many women that I know. Because this is exactly the issue at hand. I never said that leaders said those things during the K hearing, but millions of fellow Americans did say those things. The pervasive culture is that girls are for fucking and are disposable and that’s why I said I’m sad for your daughter. I’d love to see you fighting that on her behalf rather than excusing it or pretending it doesn’t exist.

Lots of people have suffered trauma. And noone else gets told that they deserve their trauma or that it was their fault. No-one else gets mocked for their trauma. No-one else gets told they are acting like a victim for talking about it.

I’d like to say that you just don’t care about other people, but that’s clearly not the case, and that’s what makes this even worse. You do care, but you refuse to see and accept some things; maybe because it brings forth that you can’t actually protect a lot of people, and you’d like to.

It is perhaps the most absurd thing that I’ve ever heard that 70% of domestic abuse is perpetrated by women. Read the last part of this to get real data on who perpetrates domestic abuse.

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Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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