Nobody knows what’s right or best for somebody else — not even their parents, or perhaps especially not their parents. Most people when they get older want to have grandchildren, but it doesn’t mean they are owed to them. My mom, it turns out, isn’t particularly interested in her grandchild. Sure, she loves him and she’s otherwise a good person in many ways, but it’s just not her thing, and although that initially hurt me I came to realize that making her play some kind of role that had been devised for her and was expected of her by someone else wasn’t really kind or fair. I sure don’t want to live by other people’s expectations, so why should she?

Wanting what you authentically want (or don’t want) on a soul level is neither inherently good nor bad. It just is — and someone who heeds that is more likely to have a pleasant and fulfilling life than someone who doesn’t. Just my two cents……….

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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