No problem with you only wanting one partner. That’s the idea -that people can create the lives that work for them, and not the lives that others/society have deemed acceptable. I feel the easiest way to answer your other questions is to link you my recent story about the history of patriarchy.

You may not feel constraints upon your person, but perhaps that’s because you naturally fit well into societal norms. What about all the other men (and women) who don’t? As cool and fun as you are, you are not the actual center of the universe. 😉 Many, many people, both male and female have suffered greatly for refusing to conform and as I say in the article, even for those who conform, there is a price to pay. What’s wrong with allowing people to be who they actually are? It’s hard to know what that is because we have such rigid expectations, even at this juncture. What is nature and what is nurture is hard to determine.

phe·no·type

/ˈfēnəˌtīp/

noun

BIOLOGY

  1. the set of observable characteristics of an individual resulting from the interaction of its genotype with the environment.

“I’d make a very poor emperor; I have no idea what I’d do with a harem.” And this demonstrates a lot right there, about the nature of the domination machine. The assumption is that someone rules and that the others are in subjugation. I do not rule my men (nor my girlfriend either). We have a partnership-oriented relationship. No hierarchy is necessary; there is no pie to be sliced up in love — it is an infinite resource. And that doesn’t mean that polyamory is right for everyone, but it does speak to a world that is more collaborative and less about who is at the top of some hierarchy that needs to constantly be jousted for.

And yes, it’s great to focus on happiness and what one wants to bring into your life, but ignoring what’s wrong in the world won’t actually make it go away. The ostrich-with-head-in-sand technique doesn’t actually work very well.

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Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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