No-one should be held responsible for the actions of others, and it’s really a sad commentary on the insidiousness of this dynamic in our society that your friends thought they had standing to chastise you.

I’m middle aged and don’t dance much in clubs anymore, but when I do dance, like last weekend at my husband’s holiday party, I danced my ass off — not by grinding or other overtly sexual moves, but by truly embodying all of my authentic physical self which had sexual energy elements to it. And, it got a really great reception, particularly from the other women at the party, who no doubt have censored themselves along the way too. I hope that at some point you will feel safe enough again to dance the way that you really want to.

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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