Jim, there is so much that you’ve written that really resonated. I was just thinking this morning before I read this that I know the way I live isn’t right for everyone, but at the same time, it feels so right and natural to me, that I sometimes forget that. I also believe that it’s right for more people than those who have tried it out, because sexual exclusivity as a sign of commitment is such a strong part of our culture, even though it’s just a patriarchal vestige.

For more than 20 years, I was in a sexually exclusive relationship because that’s what we thought we were supposed to do. We didn’t really even realize we had options. It’s not that we were unhappy or even bored with each other before, but we both strongly feel that we are living now the way that is most natural to us.

I wrote something yesterday about how I see now that I’ve always been polyamorous at heart, even if I didn’t start living in a way that reflects that until 5 years ago, and even if we don’t have a typical polyamorous life. I’ll probably publish it tomorrow.

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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