It’s really great to hear this coming from a guy! But, as Pablo Pereyra said, the need to sexually control women to ascertain paternity (and other reasons) is only a part of patriarchal societies, and we’ve only had those for the past 10K years. Current matrilineal societies care a lot less about this, and in the case of the Na of China, they don’t care about it at all. There are functionally no such thing as husbands or fathers.
For 97% of human history, even though pair bonding and marriage were the norm sexual exclusivity was not, not even for women.
For thousands of years these sexual customs had been accepted as natural among the people of the Near and Middle East. Inherent within the very practice of the sexual customs was the lack of concern for the paternity of children — and it is only with a certain knowledge of paternity that a patrilineal system can be maintained.
These ancient sexual customs were denounced as wicked and depraved and it was for this reason that the Levite priests devised the concept of sexual “morality”: premarital virginity for women, marital fidelity for women, in other words, total control over the knowledge of paternity.
When God Was A Woman, Merlin Stone, page 160