I totally get this. It was me exactly up until about 5 years ago. I even wrote a piece for a poly friend’s blog about why I choose monogamy and it was all of these reasons. And then things changed and I kinda got called to go and find my other partner Nat, and I did. And now my husband and I are really happy as a couple who make room for others in our bed and in our life.

I didn’t want tattoos until about 5–6 years ago either and now I have 4 and want more. This is not to say that you will change or that you need to. When people actually do monogamy because they choose it rather than beause it’s the only ethical option they feel they have, it can be really awesome! When you know why you do what you do and it’s in line with your real self and real needs in the moment, to me, that’s the important thing.

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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