I repect your point of view and am sorry that this has been your experience. This is a complex issue with no gender being entirely “at fault” for lack of a better word. Women are socialized to be sexy but not to be sexual. Many women don’t know what they want or how to participate in a satisfying sexual experience because they’ve been so shamed around their own sexuality that they are often cut off from it. The whole notion of men as being active pursuers who then subdue their more passive prey and act upon them/perform for them is a dynamic that is harmful to both men and women, and as you have so aptly pointed out, because it tends to not lead to satisfying sexual experience for either partner because it’s not participatory or fully connected.