I don’t disagree, but that’s because their emotions are having them, rather than them actually feeling and integrating their authentic emotions. And in many cases, their real emotions (fear, etc.) are so suppressed that they are running these people like puppets and their behavior is entirely unconscious. This is the whole point — when you are conscious of your emotions then you have more control over them. There are a lot more hysterical men on the internet than women, and although that has various reasons, at least one of the major ones is that most men don’t have good fluency with and understanding of their emotions. They then construct intellectual sounding constructs that are full of holes to cover for the fact that they are actually just being run by sheer emotion. Jordan Peterson and his acolytes are a perfect example.

  1. Who does the other person involved remind me of and am I reliving another older conflict or wound through them?
  2. Am I feeling unheard or otherwise undermined and is that truly taking place right now, or is that an old dynamic raising its head that is getting projected onto the present situation?
  3. What am I afraid of right now that is causing me to lash out?
  4. Where can I take responsibility for myself in this situation? Do I need to make an apology or give an explanation to someone?

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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