I applaud so much of this. It’s an important topic, but even I feel it’s a bit heavy-handed in places, which may cause some of your male readers to shy away and dismiss the valuable things you’ve said because they are inter-laced with what probably comes across as virtue-signalling to some of them due to lack of nuance.

Not having great skills around vulnerability is a problem for many men and is encouraged by a largely dominance-oriented hierarchy structure (Man Box), but I’m going to venture that plenty of men have some access to vulnerability some of the time. I know a lot of men like this. Also, the sexism of not being interested in women or what they have to say is likely more unconscious than overt for most men, and again is a function of the performative hierarchy of how they’ve largely been socialized. This speaks to the culture they’ve grown up in more than it does to their inherent flaws and inhumanity or casual disregard for women. I think that should be recognized.

My husband is a wonderful man and a great feminist ally, but he still tends to talk over me or interrupt me a lot of the time. It’s a deeply engrained habit, but he’s working on it and apologetic when I point it out to him. My recommendation to you would be to add in more qualifiers like “some men” and “very often” rather than to make such blanket statements about half of the population. As a feminist, I don’t want to be characterized as irrefutably having certain traits, just because they are typical in women. I’m guessing that men feel the same way.

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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