I agree with a lot that you’ve said. It’s the gooey perfect romance illusion that isn’t particularly constructive. This is my favorite definition of a soulmate: We have many Soulmates in this life but their purpose is all the same- they are here to challenge and awaken us so our soul can evolve into a higher state of consciousness.
Frankly, that’s what your life partner is for also — not to give you endless happiness, but rather to drive up your shit so that you have an opportunity to deal with it (within a hopefully loving construct). Dealing with your self and all of your baggage is where the potential for happiness comes in. Your soul mate and your partner may be one and the same or not. In fact, you may have many soul mates. Interestingly, my mom is one of mine, and boy does she force me to grow… 😏 but she also has my back and has loved me deeply all of my life.
This is my take on all of this anyway……. interpretations may vary!