As I learned when I read “The Heroine’s Journey” by Maureen Murdock, this is what is known as being a father’s daughter (whether you even had a father present in the home or not). It is the girl’s identification with of all things male and masculine because society says those are what is valued. She wants to be like her father and to win his approval. Simultaneously, femaleness, motherhood, and feminine qualities are universally undervalued, and so the father’s daughter does this also, often quite subconsciously.
I too went through a transformation wherein I realized that no matter how much of a father’s daughter I was, I was never going to be treated with respect in a patriarchal world. That’s when I began to forge my own path and find my own power that didn’t require external validation. As you pointed out as well, it was a blessing in disguise.