All my statistics have underlined links to the studies they came from, but here's some more:

"One of the most reliable sex differences in reactions to marriage is in who files for divorce. This difference has been documented at least as far back as 1867, and it is still true now, in Europe, Australia, and the U.S. Who is more likely to walk away from a marriage? Women. They initiated about 62 percent of divorces in the U.S. in 1867, and that number is now closer to 70 percent."

Women are hep to get married because they've been told all their lives that this will lead to fulfillment and happiness and it's what they are supposed to do, in part because it's the precursor to having children, their supposed main function on earth. What they discover is that the reality is often quite different than the narrative. The most recent trend is that divorced or widowed women don't want to get married again. They still want love and companionship, but they want more autonomy and less responsibility for taking care of the cooking and cleaning for someone else.

"After being told their whole lives that they are only complete people if they become wives and mothers, many women are discovering that they are just fine as singletons — some of them as never-married people and some of them as never-again divorcees or widows. The trend seems to be related to a desire for greater independence and autonomy and to have the kinds of love relationships that do not inhibit that.

In a recent story that I published about how much more home-keeping and childcare work women do, even if they also work outside the home, and even if they are the primary breadwinners for their family, I got a lot of frustrated comments from women.

“This is why I will never get married again. Marriage is a raw deal for women. Marriage is how you get trapped in a life of domestic servitude to a man. Don’t give up your own hopes and dreams for some guy who’s just looking for somebody to clean up after him & make his life comfortable. It’s not worth it.”

“(My husband) used to appear quite domesticated prior to “putting a ring on it”. We actually shared a house, so I assumed that I knew what living with him would be like. But apparently saying “I do” removed his ability to operate the washing machine… and that is just the tip of the iceberg!”

“Definition of marriage for women — slavery. If you can’t behave like an adult you don’t deserve to be in a relationship. Women have allowed this shit to happen.”

So women are not bored with their husbands. They are tired of being taken for granted. You might ask men the same thing then - where is the commitment in treating your wife life a house elf rather than a life-partner? It is well documented that this is a major issue.

"Married women also get the least sleep and the fewest hours of leisure-time. Interestingly women who live with a male partner but haven’t married him have more leisure time — an extra 35 minutes per day — compared with married women.

This suggests that it’s not just having a man around that’s the problem. Rather, the issue seems to lie with the expectations that come with being his “wife”.

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

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